Some relationships aren’t worth fighting for, and it would be better for everyone involved if they were allowed to die gracefully, but there are lots of relationships which start to struggle for fairly ‘minor’ reasons, and these are definitely worth fighting for.
If you believe that your relationship is one of the ones that can be saved, then you just need to work at finding the right fix. It probably won’t be easy, and it certainly won’t be like all of those chick flicks and fairy tales you’ve seen in the past, but you can with some effort, get a struggling relationship back on track. Here are some tips to help you do just that:
Re-evaluate the Reasons for Your Relationship
If you’re in a relationship with someone, there has to be a reason why you chose them over the millions of other fish in the sea, right? Sit down and think about what attracted you to them, why you enjoyed their company so much and the things you most value about them. Then, think about which of these qualities they still possess. This may be enough for you to start actively appreciating them again, instead of taking all of the good stuff for granted. Get them to repeat the same exercise with you in mind and be open and honest, and you could get back on track much sooner than you think.
Evaluate Your Own Faults
At the getherbackguide, the writer talks about what you did wrong being a possible cause of relationship breakdown, and it’s true – it can be tempting to blame the other party completely, but that is rarely the case. Relationships are partnerships and when they start to struggle it generally isn’t one person’s fault. So, examine your own faults before you start putting all of the blame on your spouse, work on your own issues, and you might just see an improvement.
Communicate the Right Way
Communication is the key to saving a failing romance, but you need to communicate in the right way. You need to actually listen to what the other person is saying and take it on board without being outraged and offended. You also need to talk in a calm, fair and non-confrontational way. If you can’t do this without help, speaking to a relationship counselor can be helpful. Just makes sure that you do address any and all concerns you may have.
Go on Dates
When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, it’s easy to get stuck in the same boring routine, which can make the relationship lose its spark. To counteract this, schedule weekly date nights where you make an effort to dress up and go out to fancy restaurants, catch a show or do the kinds of things you used to do when you first started dating. Do this, and you might just fall in love all over again.
If you can’t forgive your spouse for the things they’ve done that have hurt you, the relationship is doomed. It might not be easy, but find a way to forgive and heal together if you want to stay together.